I talk to myself ,

I talk to myself, By Ankit teli

Asking questions, one after the other.
I try to answer them all,
But nowhere do I find the success.

I talk to you,
Imagining you in my thoughts,
Believe me I find it so real,
As if it's really you sitting right across.

So much do I have to say?
Yet somehow I go silent,
So much do I want to shout?
Yet I hide it into my tears, defeated…
So much do I want to slap you?
But my hands, trembling, frozen…
So much do I want to love you?
But my heart, heavy …. Cheated…..

The Time we built together,
The plant together we planted,
Why suddenly u felt…
I wasn’t the real Friend that u wanted.

That level of comfort,
That easiness, that smoothness,
Where no word was left unsaid,
Why suddenly u felt…
That I will not understand….

That childish behavior,
At times you and at times me,
Teaching each other,
Remember? ? … We both behaved alike…! !
Why suddenly u felt…?
That you are no more a child,
Why did you let that kiddo you die?

I am sorry I cannot accept,
The death of the child within each of us…
I still talk to them
And I find them very much alive…..

That sadness which at times appeared,
We turned them into smiles… 
Holding each others hands we moved on,
Together we walked miles…
Why suddenly you felt,
That my hand was not the one…..
And left me all alone….

Let me admit to you my dear friend,
Living without you… I cannot imagine…
My heart feels weak without your presence…
My eyes…tears.... Posing silence…

I request you, I beg you…
Please don’t leave me…
Please don’t go….

tomorrow never came

tomorrow never came By Ankit teli

why did you promise tomorrow?
tomorrow never came and i was never the same
that why i insist on holding on to today.

what is in my dreams?
if i am tormented by your beuaty
and memories of your image is all i see
please have mercy on me
and set me free

reality looks so bleek
when you no longer stand next to me
when i dont run to where youll be
when we are no longer complete

is it fair to blame our destiny?
for dealing us with this reality
and ruining all our fantasies
of a life where all our dreams come true for you and me

let me say that i wish it so
but deep inside i know its no
that faith for me was to be alone
and in my nights with missery is how i cope

i guess its not all bad
because i make everyone laugh while i stay sad
fake emotions to blend in glad

ask my self when will i be ok
i pray the lord helps me along my way
but if forever i am to feel this pain
i will understand that i am too, partly to blame
but i will always wonder why?
our tomorrow never came

Sorry, I am so sorry my love...

Sorry, I am so sorry my love... By Ankit Teli

Sorry, I am so sorry my love. I hurt you without any reason
Your tears made my heart cry. Why I did to you that I don't know
Forgive me! I am so sorry my love

Sorry, I am so sorry my love. I scold you without any reason
Your pain made my heart to think
My cruel heart suspects you for nothing
Forgive me! I am so sorry my love

Sorry, I am so sorry my love. I did not mean to hurt you
When you cry then I cry more than you
Because I love you all my heart and soul
Forgive me! I am so sorry my love

Sorry, I am so sorry my love
I told you that I would never hurt you again
but again I made your tears flow once more
Now, I promise you that I will not hurt you again
Forgive me! I am so sorry my love.

I will paint our love,,,

I will paint our love,,, By Ankit Teli

I will paint our love
With the colors of the rainbow
As clear as the raindrops
With the golden frames of moonlight and stars at night

I will paint our love
With the waves of our heartbeats
With the glow of your smiling eyes
As beautiful as your voice when you sing

I will paint our love
It may look nostalgic and ironic
Like I painted a rose in blue
No one could understand, only me and you

Wherever you go
Whatever I became
Our portrait of love won't fade away
Coz in our hearts, this will live for eternity

Do you know how many feelings i carry in my heart...

Do you know how many feelings i carry in my heart... By Ankit teli


Do you know how many feelings i carry in my heart,
how do i end my day and how do i start.
Missing you and longing 4 u is all i can do,
but i wish as i feel you feel the same too.

Do you know how many unspoken words i wanna say,
how can i say i keep on finding the ways.
Loving you and praying 4 you is all i can do
but i wish as i feel you feel the same too.

Do you know how many dreams i have in my eyes,
how can i fulfill them i keep on telling the lies.
Preaching you and caring 4 you is all i can do,
but i wish as i feel you feel the same too.

Do you know how much pain is deep in my soul,
how do i bear them and keep trying to come out of the whole,
Searching you and urging 4 u is all i can do
but i wish as i feel you feel the same too.

Do you know how much I LOVE YOU,
i wanna tell but unable to do.
Missing u, loving u, preaching u, searching u , wat else i can do,
I wish as i feel you feel the same too........

I'm So Sorry...

I'm So Sorry... By Ankit teli

I'm sorry of being so emotional
I'm sorry of being so possessive
I'm sorry that I cry for you
I'm sorry because I can't live without you

I'm sorry for the tears you shed
I'm sorry for the damage I made
I'm sorry I've made you sick
Sorry I hurt you so deep

I'm sorry for giving you sleepless nights
I'm sorry for each and every fight
I'm sorry for your pain & agony
I'm sorry for the missing harmony

I'm sorry for my selfish love
I'm sorry for not caring enough
I'm sorry for my restlessness
I'm sorry for the losing grace

I'm sorry my friend I made you mad
I'm sorry darling you are so sad
Sorry for not giving you any happiness
Sorry because it's my disgrace

I'm sorry for thinking of you so very much
I'm sorry I always miss your touch
I'm sorry of being so mad about you
I'm sorry for my every blue

I'm sorry of being so immature
I'm sorry now that can't be cured
I'm sorry of being myself
I'm sorry that I've failed

I'm sorry and sorry again
I'm sorry of being insane
But believe me that I love you
Should I say sorry for that too?

I'm sorry I'm not perfect
I'm sorry for my ugly face
I'm sorry that I'm stupid

I'm even sorry for my race
I'm sorry I'm not funny
I'm sorry I'm not smart
I'm sorry I cant tell you

The truth within my heart
I'm sorry that you hate me
I'm sorry I'm in love
I'm sorry I act the way I do

I never thought it'd matter to you
I'm sorry for the tears I cry
I'm sorry I'm a failure in your eye
I'm sorry for a lot of things

But one thing im not sorry for
I'm not sorry for being me.

Life Goes On ....

Life Goes On .. By Ankit teli

In every human life,
there are some moments when one is sad and depressed
Frustrated from every zone of life,
And feel like leaving everything & going away
And Life Goes on …

Some moments in which
one is wrapped with tensions
one wants to get out of them
and fly high in the sky
But cant run away, and life goes on …

Some moments in which,
one who adores hurts sentiments,
one needs a support, a shoulder to dry on,
But doesn’t find one , and life goes on …

Some moments in which one gets tired of life
or so intensely hurt that one wants to die
one wishes to end up with
life at that very moment, and life goes on …

And in every human life on day arrives
When there is a big halt to one’s life.
And then the people cry
and show that they were concerned

Then the question arises
Do they wait for one’s death,
To care, To understand the one
If so, then wait till death and untill then
LIFE GOES ON …

In Search Of Destiny Door

In Search Of Destiny Door By Ankit teli


My life is completely messed up,
Like a dark, thick soup lying in a cup,
No color, no life, just so still,
And the numbers of joys are always nill.

I am walking on a lonely road,
In the dark night.
All I can see is the popping toad,
And the bat’s scary flight.

I don’t know what to do or where to go?
All I know that I am feeling very low.
Sometimes in this lonely and unreasonable journey,
I stop for a moment to think, WHY?
Why to me people always hate?
Why in my life joys and sorrows never equate.
Why does God; for me, never opens the gate,
Of his lovely and beautiful estate.
Where everything goes in it’s own routine,
And to hurt others, people are never keen.
Where people like me, never live,
As their life never rip.

But when unable to find answers,
To my unending Questions.
I start to walk again,
In that lonely and never ending lane.

Then like a shadow, I disappear…
Into the deep darkness, which is never, clear.
So on and on and forever, I walk,
With sorrows, ignorance, problems and no one to talk,
Just to find the DESTINY DOOR on which I can “KNOCK

5 Minutes

5 Minutes By Ankit teli

a crazy day it was
things that i should not have said
things that i should not have done
had all been said and done
in 5 minutes

i stormed out of the building
with a view to run away
run away to a place where no one can disturb

i wanted to spend 5 minutes alone
i wanted to sit down and think
of what i said
of what i did

riding my bike
with the wind behind me
i rushed into the evening traffic
hoping to set right certain things

blinded by fury
clouded by sadness
i was a maniac on the roads
driving at the speed of light

i sped past everyone
stopping nowhere
i reached my destination
a small little cafe
in the middle of the city

escaping a chaotic and fast paced city
i stepped inside a shangrila
with no one to disturb
with no one seemingly caring a dime
i took my place in the corner
placed my order
and set about thinking
about what i had done

5 minutes all it took
for the gates of heaven to open up
5 minutes of madness
now washed away by 5 minutes of realization

5 minutes it took
to find myself once again
5 minutes is all it took
for me to find life once again

5 minutes of crying out (loud)
is all that was needed
if only i thought about it all
for a mere 5 minutes

a time of sorrow
now washed away in just 5 minutes
a lifetime full of happiness
now back inside me in just 5 minutes

Honey, I Miss You

honey, I Miss You By Ankit teli

I’m sitting here
near the window
I reminisce
and think about you
The days we used to share
It’s driving me crazy
I just don’t know what to do
I’m just wondering if you do care?

I don’t wanna let you know
how I feel
How the pain is
That is killing me
How difficult it is
To kill time without you
I know you’ve got things to do
things to look into
But do you feel the same
As I do?


It’s been a long time
I am lost without you
Since you went away
I don’t really feel like talking
I forgot how it is to eat
How it feels to sleep
There’s no one here to love me
Honey do you understand?
I can’t do or be without you
Can you hear me calling for you?

No one knows me

No one knows me By Ankit teli


Walk with me in burden
come sit and feel my grief

watch out for damaged waste

in terms of wrong, I am chief

Hold my hand in darkness

come feel the fear within my heart

watch out for haunting ghosts

In this horror movie I play the worst part

Sit next to me in sadness

Come hear the cries of my pain

Watch out for broken glass fragments

In this storm, I am the rain

Stand firm with me in catastrophe

Come hold my hand in yours

Watch out for the uncertain things

In this world, we are caught in wars

Talk to me in hope

Come see if my future holds a brighter day

Watch out for the obstacles

In this winding path, I tend to lose my way

Sing to me in heavenly praises

Come skip with me in my moment of bad

Watch out for blinding rays of sunshine

In this happiness, I sometimes can not see

Stuck in a dream

Stuck in a dream By Ankit teli

sitting inside the train
after finishing work
i watch the people
rush home just like me

like migrating birds
travelling a long distance
i make this daily journey
from one end to another

i make this journey
from one end to another
to keep me distracted
from all things i am missing

a loving family i left behind
my happiness knew no limits
sadness brushed outside with ease
living a life as it should be

eager to climb up the ladder
eager to prove people wrong
i sacrificed happiness
i traded joy for “loneliness”

with my eyes watching the exit
my heart yearns out to
the home i left behind
while looking to rebuild my nest

Thinking about a lot of things

thinking about a lot of things By Ankit teli


i had been thinking,
thinking about a lot of things
from the little boy in the playground
to the granny in the park!

from the things i had done years ago
to what i did yesterday
been thinking what i am doing now
to what i will be doing tomorrow!

a lot of choices;
a lot of options;
life is about choices, everyone says
and choosing the options wisely

from the road less travelled
to the most crowded streets
i had made the choices
and chosen the options my way!

now, tired of all this
and the mask slowly wearing off
i am being forced to choose
i have to make one final choice.

standing at the door,
do i reapply the makeup
and continue to wear this mask (forever)
or do i give in to life’s desires?

Keep Dreaming

Keep Dreaming By Ankit teli

afraid of what I would see
if I peeked inside,
I became deaf and dumb
to the emotions that my heart cried out;

the day slowly slips by
bringing nothing to conclusion
bringing nothing new to light,
it slowly dragged on the inevitable;

with every step that I take,
my confidence grows even further
allowing me to take on everything
allowing me to acknowledge my emotions;

like a wild fire, that went out of control,
the madness around me morphed from a
child with no fears, into an adult
scared to accept what my hearts cries out;

it seems that I knew this forever,
lying within me, making it presence felt now and then,
like the seasons changing,
my mind changed what I once thought was forever;

time slipped so quickly,
and before I could take a breath,
I realized it’s now or never,
I realized how much I had lost;

shrouded by the safe haven I built around me,
I failed to acknowledge the beautiful sun shining outside,
I failed to notice the chirping of the birds,
I forgot to laugh and smile enjoying the things I like to do;

as each wave of emotions came in slowly,
under the bright light of the moon,
I stood here hypnotized by the glow of
what life still has to offer;

amidst the chaos of my soul,
one dim light still flickered on,
strong enough to prevent the
darkness engulfing my soul completely;

strong enough to keep the
river of dreams flowing
to keep dreaming of a wonderful
beginning for you and me together;

Have I lost you ?

Have I lost you ? By Ankit teli

There was a time when we walked hand-in-hand,

Without a care in the world for love was near.

And then we paused on a road

Went carelessly into a dark

Where time stood still for a while..



We were groping for each other’s warmth

Trying to find our way out of this dark

Do we still care, we asked one day

And the abyss grew darker



We moved our separate ways,

Found new roads to explore

But my heart still longs for you

Asks “Have I lost you ?”



I want to come back to the alley

Will you be there ?

Will you let us find our way out together

Out on a single road,

Hands and hearts like olden times ?

Me,Myself and I

Me,Myself and I By Ankit teli
coming out of the shadows
of the past and reaching
to the light that is now
shining in its glory
i realized i am standing all alone,
with the whole world at my disposal;

i searched, i needed somebody
to continue the exploration,
or so i thought; how
naive and so dumb one can become;

wasting precious time
doing nothing other
than wandering through life
i became more confused than before;

unable to run anymore,
i sat down to take stock
and i realized i got
me, myself and i;

learned a lot along the way,
and now my very own best friend
exploring uncharted territories
me myself and i
that’s all i got in the end
that’s what i found out
me, myself and i;

दुरावा

कितीही दुर आलो जरी
तरीही तुझ्या सोबत मी,
सखे रडणं थांबवं आता
तुझ्या हसण्यात सुद्दा मी

डोळे ओले माझेही झाले,
अस्वस्थ झालो अन् नाराज,
पण उद्या भेटणं आहेचं नक्की,
जरी दुर झालो आज

अंतरामध्ये मोजलं तर,
दुरावा खुप मोठा आहे,
पण हा दुरावा खुप लहान आहे,
कारण तु माझ्या अंतरात आहेस

कधी हसवून मला हसवणारी,
स्वतः रडून मला भिजवणारी,
प्रेयसीचं नातं जपतानाचं,
बायकोसारखं प्रेम करणारी

तुझ्या डोळ्यातला प्रत्येक थेंब,
कसा काय सांग वाया जाईल,
जपुन ठेव तुझ्या अश्रुधारा,
लग्नामध्ये त्याचा उपयोग होईल.

हा तात्पुर्ता दुरावा आहे,
समजुन घेईल माझं गोड बाळ,
दिसा मागे दिस बुडुन
सरुन जाईल हा काळ

घडयाळाचे काटे आहोत आपण,
दिशांनी वेगळे सोडलेले,
काही क्षणासाठी बोलतो आपण,
पण ह्रदयापासुन जोडलेले

"आई मागितली असती"

दु:खाच्या डोंगराखाली
दबलेल ते बालपण
रोजचं होता वैशाख
कधी दिसलाचं नाही श्रावण

नव्हता आपल्यांचा आपलेपणा
नव्हती भाग्याची साथ
लेकराच्या डोक्यावर ठेवायला
नव्हता मायेचा तो हात

कधी नाही पाहीली बासुंदी
कधी पाहिला नाही मुरंबा..
बहीण बापुडी काय करणार
नव्हता बापाचाही खांदा.

जेव्हा मला माय
सोडुन निघुन गेली
डोळ्यातली ओली
आसवं सुकुन गेली.

कधी कधी ते एकटेपणाचं सावटं
मनात काहुर माजवायचं
माय परत येईल
भोळ मन स्वप्न सजवायचं

बालपण सारं गेलं
वेदनांच्या सागरात बुडुन
मग संस्कारांचा
मऊपणा येणार तरी कुठुन

नव्हती मायेची सावली
नव्हता प्रेमाचा गारवा
सुकून गेलं रोपट
पण मिळला नाही ओलावा

आज ही दुःखाची सावट
तशीचं राहीली
कधी मायेचा उबारा
कधी माया नाही पाहीली

नको धनदौलत नको संपत्ती
कशावरचं आशा ठेवली नसती
देवाने काही मागायला सांगितलं असतं
तर मी "आई मागितली असती"

प्रेम

प्रेम शब्दावर येऊन
अडकून बसणं म्हणजे प्रेम
दोन मनांना जोडलेल्या शब्दात
गुंतुन बसण म्हणजे प्रेम

छोट्याशा कारणाने त्याची
आठवण येणं म्हणजे प्रेम
आठवण कधी येत नाही तिची
तिला न विसरणं म्हणजे प्रेम

आयुष्य चालण्य़ाची प्रेरणा
नवा श्वास देणं म्हणजे प्रेम
कायमची सोबत असल्याचा
विश्वास देणं म्हणजे प्रेम

मनानं विचार करणं
शब्दात जगणं म्हणजे प्रेम
अर्धी रात्र बोलणं बसणं
खुळ्यागत वागणं म्हणजे प्रेम

कधी प्रेमाच्या नावाने
खुप खुप भांडण म्हणजे प्रेम
नुसताचं आवाज ऐकून
मनाला जाणणं म्हणजे प्रेम

कधी भावूक होऊन
शब्द अवघडणं म्हणजे प्रेम
ती मुसमुसू लागल्यावर
माझ रडणं म्हणजे प्रेम

कधी उगाचं खटयाळपणे
तिला छळणं म्हणजे प्रेम
तिला होणा-या त्रासाने
जीव जळणं म्हणजे प्रेम

एका क्षणात प्रेमविश्वात
रमणं म्हणजे प्रेम
हळवी माऊ, खट्याळ बोक्याची
जोडी जमणं म्हणजे प्रेम

प्रेम नावाची कवीता
पुरी करणं म्हणजे प्रेम
सगळ्यांसाठी जगूनसुद्दा
तीचा उरण म्हणजे प्रेम

होईल ते पाहता येईल म्हणुन
चालतं राहणं म्हणजे प्रेम
एकमेकांना भेटण्याची
वाट् पाहणं म्हणजे प्रेम

कोकण किनारा सोबत फ़िरण्याची
स्वप्न म्हणजे प्रेम
'तु अन् मी' ला फुलासारखं
जपण म्हणजे प्रेम